"Leather" Anniversary

Scott and I celebrated three blissful years as husband and wife tonight. Actually, our celebration went more like this. On Saturday morning, Scott walked in through the front door with a big smile. Happy anniversary! he said, and handed me my present (we always give the traditional anniversary gifts). He has never been good at secrets and has a hard enough time making it from the store to the house without telling me what he got, not to mention waiting a few days to give it to me. My gift to him showed up in the mail yesterday so I let him open it. So, today, we both left the house without remembering that it was our anniversary. We spoke on the phone several times and still forgot to wish each other a happy anniversary. On my way home from work at 9:30 p.m. I stopped at McD's. We shared a "fast" but romantic meal on the floor of our living room, where Scott now remains, passed out.
Our dinner converstaion went something like this:
Me: It's really hard to believe that we've only been married three years.
Scott: It feels like 20.
Me: I know (groan).
Scott: I hope it stays like that.
Me: What do you mean?
Scott: I don't want it to go by too fast.
Me: Awww......

The Barnhouse

My parents think we're crazy, but it sure makes a statement, huh? A tribute to all the farms around here. Inside pictures coming later this week when we finish the drywall. Still trying to be in by Christmas....

Thanksgiving Day

some more wedding pics

play date

Scott made my morning, and Sawyer's, by taking him out of the room when he woke up at 6:30 so that I could sleep in (until 8). I found these cute pics of Sawyer playing with daddy on my camera and I had to post them all.

sleepytime

The co-sleeper is a great piece of gear. One side drops down and it saddles up to the bed, creating a level extension so that you can easily reach over and grab or soothe the baby at night. It has served us well for the last four months and, even if I had a nursery, I would still use it. Recently, however, Sawyer has taken to swinging a leg over the side ... a casual gesture but one that has me imagining he will, somehow, suddenly catapult himself over the short edge in the middle of the night. In addition, I think he senses my presence next to him and wakes up shortly after I go to bed, wanting attention and company. He produces a low and annoying whine that he can maintain for a remarkably long time, driving us crazy. Eventually, he seems to end up sleeping in bed with me every night. (Please don't call the SIDS police.) While I love cuddling with my bumpkin, this situation simply will not do. I've seen far too many mom friends struggle to get the toddler out of the bed. So, we are weaning him off the co-sleeping situation. I have converted the co-sleeper into a bassinet (it also functions as a pack-and-play/changing table/playpen) with four tall walls instead of three and pushed the whole thing back against the wall in our bedroom. This means I have to get up to soothe him in the middle of the night, but maybe he can't sense my every stir. In another week or so, my plan is to move the bassinet into Justin's room until we get to the new house around Xmastime and then he can upgrade to the crib (which Scott has fully assembled so it will not fit through the door of the bedroom without dismantling).

It's been so long since this has happened that I hardly knew what to do. Sawyer passed out in my lap, mid-shake of the toy. And this after he had just awoken from a three-hour nap.

Airing the (not so) Dirty Laundry

I don't think it's hard learning to be a mom. The loving comes naturally. The transition from not mom to mom is instantaneous. Amnesia sets in and you forget what you did with your life before you became a parent. What's difficult is learning how to rearrange your own life to bring your child into it. How are you going to organize the house? How are you going to build in nap times? How are you going to eat, drive, work and sleep when you have this fragile life in your hands? Everybody ends up with the solutions that work best for them eventually, but the joy is in the journey.

I had this epiphany last night while I was doing laundry, realizing how far I've come. Before the baby was born, my laundry folding skills were well above average. I'm not some military-style freak about my laundry, but I actually enjoyed folding baskets of hot laundry into organized stacks while watching a movie. But, when the baby came, I turned into all thumbs. Presented with tiny little outfits, onesies, footed pajamas, I was as befuddled as I am when trying to fold a fitted sheet. With baby clothes, nothing flattens properly. The shapes are all awkward. Stacks topple over. I struggled to find a way to fit everything in the drawers in an organized manner. (Was I just blessed with too many hand-me-downs or does everybody have his problem?)

I am finding my own way of dealing with the new laundry in my life just like I am discovering the best nighttime routine and nap schedule for our family. The joy is in the journey, but the real pleasure is sharing that journey with friends.

On that note, these are a few things I have learned about baby clothes:
1. Don't cut the tags off anything until you are actually ready to use it! I know this goes against everything "they" tell you about washing all the clothes in scent-free laundry detergent in the weeks before the baby is born. But, trust me. Some clothes will never fit your kid. Others will be the wrong season. You may get something that you love but never find the occasion to use. These clothes are a treasure if they still have the tags. You could have another kid who would appreciate some new clothes. You could make a lucky friend very happy with some top-notch hand-me-downs. Or, an entrepreneur could sell clothes on Ebay or in a consignment shop. Whatever your style - keep the tags on until you are sure. Wash only what you know you will use.

2. Before the baby is born, divide and box all the clothes by size and season. Keep a couple unseasonal outfits mixed in for balmy winter days and cool summer nights. The long plastic bins that slip under the bed work well.

3. Shortly before baby arrives prepare the 0-3 month clothes. In the top drawer place all the white t-shirts, onsies and sleepwear. In the first weeks, this will be the most popular drawer. The baby spends a large part of the first month swaddled tightly in a blanket so a white t-shirt, a diaper, socks and a hat are all that's really needed. (In the beginning, some clothes will be so small you can press them out flat in stacks. Later, they will have to be folded. See folding instructions below.)

4. In the drawers below – now this took me forever to figure out – first fold clothes in half lengthwise and then in half again. Stack them by outfit and place the stacks sideways in the drawer so that pieces of an outfit are next to each other rather than on top of each other. Traditional stacks of baby clothes are simply unstable and get destroyed when people go tearing through the drawer to find what they want - especially in the middle of the night.

5. If you have a spare drawer, place stacked bibs, hats, socks and other accessories together. Otherwise, use a basket or bin for these items. Blankets, burp clothes and wash rags need drawers or baskets of their own. Coats and dressy outfits that are only going to be worn once should go on a hanger.

6. A baby's wardrobe requires regular maintenance. Just as the baby really starts fitting into one size, open the next box and pull out some clothes that look small or seasonal. At the same time, rebox clothes that the baby is outgrowing to make more room.

A new skill

Sawyer is learning to sit up.









Sometimes he just folds in half.













He would have better luck if he didn't try to play with his feet in the process.










Hey mom, the world is tipping sideways.

Bionic Mom

My biceps are growing disproportionately large for my arm. Mommy muscles I call them. Lean, mean and solid as a rock. I don't break a drop of sweat lugging the 25 pound fully-loaded bucket seat 50 yards from the house to the car. I don't even notice Sawyer's weight when I carry him in one arm around the house like a sack of potatoes. But, after 90 seconds holding him Saturday night, my mom was ready to pass him back. Her arms were aching. I'm not making fun. I remember when our friends Bethany and Jon had their unusually large babies, I couldn't hold them for more than a few minutes before my face grew red from the strain. Now, I have one of those babies that other people can't hold. In a few more months, I'll be the only woman who can carry him at all. Let's just hope he doesn't wait until he's 18 months to learn to walk. I'll look like Popeye!

Interruption

I would just like to take a break from our regularly scheduled programming to complain about the fact that all my hair is falling out. I've known that postpartum hair loss happens; I just thought it would be more immediate and I didn't realize the actual amount involved. I wake up and it looks like a Shetland pony has been sheared on my pillow. I run my fingers through my hair once and I could braid rope with the hair that falls out. I have hair clinging to all my clothes and I have to unweave it from Sawyer’s fingers. Really - it's gross. If the average person loses about 100 hairs a day, I must be losing 300? 500? Everyone promises me I won’t go bald, but I am beginning to wonder. Fortunately, I had unusually thick hair to begin with and it practically doubled in thickness when I was pregnant. All you pregnant or recently-delivered girls out there: BE WARNED!

Vote!

Scott embraces his patriotic duty.

Mom Who?

Everything went well for Sawyer's first day at Tina's house. He ate. He slept. He doused her with spit-up. He didn't cry too much. I could tell he was happy and comfortable because when I showed up, he barely acknowledged my presence. I got a brief smile - yeah, hey, whatever mom - and then he went back to watching the other kids play. No wonder he isn't complaining. He's surrounded by women!

Breath in... Breath out...

I'm a wreck. Tomorrow I take Sawyer to the sitters for the first time. I hyperventilate every time I think about it. While I've left him for short stints over the past three-and-a-half months, it's only been with family - Scott/my parents - or Scott's secretary Ashley in our own house or our own office. Now we're talking all day with a veritable stranger and four other kids at her house. But, the time has come. I knew it would, and I've been steeling myself for it. I figured, eventually, Sawyer would want to be more interactive in waking hours and would need a quiet environment for napping. And, while that is happening, the truth is that I just can't seem to function properly at work with my baby. Things that don't phase me at home seem 10 times worse at the office. For instance, I never think about how often he spits up until he blows chunks all over my work clothes. Never, I repeat - NEVER - allow the burp cloth to slide carelessly down even an inch while you are taking a phone call. Those cute little baby farts never smell or sound as strong as they do when emanating from your child's rear in the middle of a staff meeting. And, changing one of those runny, explosive newborn diapers on top of your desk while spewing apologies to your office mate about the smell (which she swears doesn't bother her) without getting a single drop of poop anywhere outside of the diaper can be a bit challenging. So, on deadline days at the paper - Mondays and Tuesdays - I will take Sawyer to the sitters and get my work done like a normal person. The rest of the week, I will work from home with him - in my sweats, which he can spit up all over and I won't care. That is a pretty good deal for any working mom. And, while I know Tina will be nurturing and Sawyer will enjoy having the other kids to stare at for a few days a week, I am still a total and complete wreck.

Super-Sawyer

SO, as it turns out, I am the competitive-mommy type. (That should come as no surprise given that I am the same woman who nearly divorced her husband because of a dispute over the official rules of croquet and who once made a college friend so mad during a game of 'Stratego' - I was winning – that he knocked the entire board and about 100 pieces off the table.) I don't believe in playing a game without keeping score. What's the point? So, when I saw that a local business was giving away $100 savings bond for the best Halloween costume, I quickly overcame all my reluctance, threw the Superman bunting on Sawyer, and sent Scott down the street to woo the female judges with the babe in tow. Things were looking good (lots of cooing over the baby) until they postponed the competition for a half-hour to allow the Mayor to arrive. In the meantime, an additional 58 participants arrived. The competition was stiff - one older kid was wearing a homemade red Stihl toolbox costume. Some of my friends began to leave, figuring they had no chance against the sumo wrestler or the raggedy ann doll. It got dark. The temperature dropped 15 degrees. We were still waiting on the judges. Scott could have cared less but all I could think about was the cash prize. I prepped Scott for when Sawyer's number came up. "Fly him around like superbaby so the judges can really see the cape flow," I said. He rolled his eyes. I made disparaging remarks about the other children. I elbowed people who got in our way. After an hour-and-a-half standing in the cold and dark, we lost. Not even an honorable mention. IT WAS RIGGED, I cried. (The toolbox won. It really was a great costume.) I am now considering entering Sawyer in every cute-baby contest at every fireman's parade around the 'Neck this summer. That night, I glimpsed my future: screaming at the ref on the sidelines at soccer games, pushing my kid up to the front of the line and telling the teacher that I am 'shocked' she didn't test my son for the gifted-and-talented program at school. Watch out for Super-Mom!

Stay tuned

Sawyer's Halloween pics are trapped in my coworkers camera (yes I dressed him up). So stay tuned for an update on that. Meanwhile, he has discovered his feet and is so obsessed he can do nothing else but try to grab them and hold on for dear life. I would take a picture but I left my download cord in dc last weekend, So, basically, my blog sucks this week.